Is your life really yours?

Have you ever just stopped and wondered, how much of your life is yours? I didn’t think about this until I was watching a gender reveal video and this question popped in my head, why are girls always identified with the color pink and boys identified with the color blue. Some as small as color got me thinking about everything a child doesn’t get to decide. I knew that I was right about how unfairly the society works but I needed some proof so I asked some of my teachers and friends to fill out this survey and these were the results:

When asked which color do you associate women with most of the people said any color or no color at all but that is far from the truth and we all know but some people said pink and honestly I wasn’t surprised and this is because many people associate girls with the word pink and it was only fair for me to ask what color they associate men with and this is what they said:

Yet again the most common answers were neither but blue was a common answer given by three people. You see you didn’t just wake up and think, “Oh blue is for a boy and pink is for a girl.” People get this idea from society. I’ll give you a better example. Take a look at this very popular gender reveal video.

In all the videos provided above boys are represented by the color blue whereas girls are identified with the color pink. Now, this may seem like a very small deal but it’s more than just what color a gender is represented with it about many more things that come after that and us being a part of the society have to do exactly those set of things to fit in. What did you play with when you were little? Dolls or robot control cars? I’m a girl and when I was young I only remember playing with stuffed animals and Barbie dolls but if I were a boy my choice of games would change to something like Hot Wheels or some other toys “boys” are supposed to play with. We can’t even choose what we want to play with when we are young kids because that decision is already made for. Who said that I wouldn’t have liked playing with something else if I had the choice too but I didn’t have that choice and like me, many people don’t. I get kids are too young to make choices and so parents do that for them but why base that on the gender of your child. 

Most of the people who responded to my email were females.

When I asked this question to everyone most of the females said that they played with dolls and all males said that they played with cars or robot controls. 

You see the problem is not the things, we, we are the real problem. I can’t even keep count of how many times I have heard the phrase, ‘Why are you crying like a girl?’ What is so ironic is that I’m a girl and I will cry like a girl but this phrase is mostly used for men and whenever I hear I just want to go up to a person and give them a lecture then and there but I keep it to myself but this is a problem. It may just be a “phrase” but it’s more than that. Women cry like men. We aren’t aliens that we cry any differently and it’s about time people start understanding that. Along with that there are other phrases like being the “man” of a relationship or being the “man” of the house. Believe me, when I say this I don’t even understand why this exists in the first place. What does being the “man” even mean? “Being the man” is usually used for people who are strong and independent but both men and women can be those things and calling it “the man” offends the entire female gender. 

I have always been a curious person and I don’t need to question everything but I have to question things that are wrong about society and things that need improvement or change. 

When you are born you are slammed with stereotypes based on your gender and throughout your life who go along with it and then when your child is born you do the same to them. Women and men both don’t get a life full of freedom and their choices. When some tell a man not to cry like a girl not only are you offending the women but you are also offending boys and that is because they don’t need anybody’s permission if they want to cry. Your gender does not determine what you feel. A boy has just as much of a right to cry like every woman. They don’t need to feel like they have to hide their pain and suffer in silence just because people around them will not accept them the way they are. 

I asked someone a very simple question about the colors and how girls are supposed to be represented by the color pink and they replied with, ‘Maybe it is because the color pink is delicate and so are women.’ I can’t blame them for having such a mindset because so many people around the globe do. All my life I have seen people think of women as weak, delicate, well mannered and caring and all my life I’ve seen people think of men as violent, angry, strong and ambitious and it’s about time we stopped. We are all humans and our gender in no way gets to define our traits. I am a woman and I am strong, independent, caring, angry, ambitious and those are some of the qualities I like about me. 

Women are seen as people who should take care of their families. They are known to be the caretakers for the family. Men on the other hand have the responsibility of working and earning money for their family. If a woman doesn’t work, she will not get criticism because that’s what the society expects out of her but if a man doesn’t work nobody will accept him. He will receive a ton of crap just for being a stay at home dad. In the country where I am from, India, people still don’t accept the fact that men don’t have to go to work or that women don’t have to be a stay at home mom. In so many situations you fear what others will think about you and just because you have that fear you don’t do what you need to to make yourself happy. Everyone will talk, heck everyone already talks, they always will but we need to make a difference for ourselves and the generation that is to come. 

Why is this world this way? People say the world is moving closer towards equality for all races, all genders, all cultures but are we. Women have started to work, vote, get the right to education but how do you fix the other important things? You say we are open-minded, you say you like equality, but you don’t because these small things make a difference. I have everything in life from a good house to a good family to the sources to live my life to the fullest but I don’t have freedom because of society. If you love a person give them the freedom to live their life. Our gender should be the furthest thing to be telling us who we have to be. 

Girls don’t have to wear long dresses. They don’t have to be caretakers if they don’t want to be. They don’t have to do a certain job because that’s what society likes to see them doing. They don’t have to be well- mannered and listen to everything they are told to do. They don’t have the color pink and are suppressed by society. They don’t have to love shopping and hate playing games. They don’t have to be on the sidelines cheering when they can be in the field playing. They don’t have to sit and take care of their children while her husband earns the money. Boys don’t have to work. Boys don’t have to be angry and arrogant and violent. Boys don’t have to love sports. Boys don’t have to love the color blue and play games all the time. Boys don’t have to be dominant. Nobody has to be anything apart from what they want to be. If you’re reading this help me make a real change in people’s thinking. Things can be so much better and we need to work towards the better. So to help me change the thinking of society and people share this with 10 people and ask them to share it with 10 other people so we can make a real change. We can be better.

Like, share and comment.

Post a Comment